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Trump Delivers Longest, Most Self-Obsessed Convention Speech in History - The Friday AM Quickie 7/19/24

By Corey Pein —

RIP Bob Newhart, the God of Deadpan, and the first grown-up comedian I remember seeing on TV. - Corey

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THE BIG NEWS

Republican Bullsh*t Roundup: Deranged Felon Rambles for Record-Breaking 92 Minutes

  • 'I Began Speaking, Very Strongly, Powerfully and Happily' and Then There Was 'Just Absolutely Blood All Over the Place' A low-energy Donald Trump recounted the attempt on his life in minute detail during his Republican National Convention speech last night, but his campaign has still released zero information about "the extent of his injuries, what treatment the Republican presidential nominee received in the hospital, and whether there may be any long-term effects on his health." via Politico and the Associated Press.
  • Melania Trump Makes First Campaign Appearance in 20 Months, Says Nothing Her husband "jumped, with a bit of exaggeration," as if surprised or frightened, when she approached him onstage. via the Washington Post, the New York Times, and HuffPost.
  • GOP Convention Has Been 'a Cocktail Party' of Corruption Every Night for Corporate Donors and Lobbyists "The big reason is the tax cuts. Is Biden going to extend the tax cuts? The answer is no," says Republican strategist Matt Mackowiak. "Trump is going to do it. They're going to put it on steroids." via the Washington Post.
  • Fash-Friendly Silicon Valley Tycoons Are Outraged About Biden's Plan to Tax Individual Assets Above $100 Million "By contrast, the Trump campaign's platform calls for the end of the 'unAmerican Crypto crackdown' and pledges to 'defend the right to mine Bitcoin.'" via the Los Angeles Times and HuffPost.
  • 'Let's Show Them What a F*cking 'Nazi' Looks Like,' Wrote Man Arrested for Threatening FBI Director Chris Wray "It's time to burn… and hang them from trees," 34-year-old John Woodbury of Roswell, Georgia, allegedly wrote online following Trump's federal indictment in the stolen classified documents case. "Hit Chris at his home. Make his family fear stepping one foot outside their god damn door." via Politico.
  • Justice Department Offering 'Retooled' Plea Deals to Jan. 6 Insurrectionists After Supreme Court Ruling "According to Justice Department statistics, there were roughly 259 defendants [including at least five Proud Boys] facing the obstruction charge – a federal statute that makes it a crime to obstruct an official proceeding – when the high court issued its ruling that narrowed how the law can be applied." via CNN.
  • Trump Announces Death of His 'Friend' Lou Dobbs, Canceled Fox Host Who Spread 2020 Election Lies, at Age 78 The pioneering cable news reactionary conspiracy theorist could most recently be found hosting a podcast for iHeartRadio and FrankSpeech, a digital network founded by MyPillow Guy Mike Lindell. via the Los Angeles Times and the Washington Post.
  • 'Trump Is a Scab': UAW Responds to Trump's Unscripted Demand for Shawn Fain's Firing The United Auto Workers union and its hard-charging president endorsed Joe Biden in January, saying "Trump stands against everything we stand for as a society." via the New York Times and Reuters.

Say It Ain't Joe: Biden 'Hurt' By Calls He Step Aside, But Don't Be Surprised If He Does, and Soon

Anonymous sources close to President Joe Biden – who previously believed he would stay in the race – now tell NBC News and the New York Times that he's coming to accept the "reality" that a majority of Democrats want him to step aside so a more capable candidate can challenge Donald Trump. Biden is said to feel personally "hurt and betrayed" by the lack of support he's gotten from party leaders, including close friends and allies. Former House speaker Nancy Pelosi and former President Barack Obama are among those working behind the scenes to persuade Biden that he has no path to victory. Publicly, Sen. Jon Tester of Montana and Rep. Jamie Raskin of Maryland yesterday joined that chorus, as did "several dozen" former foreign policy and national security officials who signed a letter saying Biden's continued candidacy poses "an unacceptable level of risk." Major donations to the campaign have plummeted, but events featuring Vice President Kamala Harris have started selling out. The growing pressure is such that Biden's own campaign staff now (also anonymously) describe a sense of inevitability around his departure from the race, and say they won't be surprised if in the coming days he endorses Harris as a replacement nominee. Republicans, who would prefer Biden stay in the race, are now describing the Democratic turmoil as an "attempted coup," which is pretty rich, considering.

Federal Contractor in Charge of Migrant Children Routinely Sexually Abused Them

The Justice Department this week sued a major federal contractor, Southwest Key, which provides housing to thousands of unaccompanied migrant children, saying its "employees, including supervisors, have raped, touched or solicited sex and nude images of children since at least 2015." The Associated Press reports that company staff knew about the abuse and concealed it, and worse, threatened children with violence if they spoke up. In all, the DOJ recorded more than 100 reports of abuse of children in the company's care. Southwest Key operates 29 shelters for migrant children in Texas, Arizona, and California; Donald Trump's evil family separation policy was great for its business. From 2015 through 2023, the government awarded the company more than $3 billion in contracts. "While I applaud the efforts to right the grievous wrongs these children have experienced, I hope the federal government will also take some responsibility for the role it played," Leecia Welch, an attorney for unaccompanied children, says.

QUICKEST QUICKIES

  • Global Microsoft Outage Causes Disruptions at Airports, Banks and More in Multiple Countries "Some news anchors broadcast live online from dark offices, in front of computers showing 'blue screens of death.'" via the Associated Press.
  • Federal Appeals Court in Missouri Blocks Biden's Student Loan Repayment Plan "More than 8 million people are enrolled in the [SAVE] repayment plan, which ties monthly payments to earnings and family size." via the Washington Post.
  • Russian Court Sentences American Reporter Evan Gershkovich to 16 Years in Prison The US State Department decried the "fake, sham legal process" and vowed to work to secure his release. via the Wall Street Journal.
  • Israel's Ben-Gvir Openly Attempts to Sabotage Ceasefire Talks with Provocative Visit to Al-Aqsa Mosque Meanwhile, Israel's delegation to peace talks decided not to participate this week without offering an explanation, and after telling US negotiators they did intend to go. via the Guardian and Politico.
  • Seattle Cop Who Laughed at and Insulted Young Woman Killed By Another Officer's Speeding Car Gets Fired Interim Seattle police chief Sue Rahr dismissed officer and cop union vice president Daniel Auderer this week, citing his "cruel and callous laughter" over the 2023 killing of Indian graduate student Jaahnavi Kandula – whose life, Auderer said at the time, had "limited value." via the Seattle Times and NBC News.

SOME NUMBER

149°F

That was the peak heat index at Persian Gulf International Airport in Asaluyeh, Iran yesterday and Wednesday, with similar extreme temperatures being recorded around the region, the Washington Post reports. Meanwhile in Arizona, NBC News reports that Maricopa County officials are investigating 322 heat-related deaths already this summer.

ON THE SHOW TODAY

7/19: It’s Casual Friday! Sam and Emma speak with Jeet Heer, national affairs correspondent for The Nation, to round up yet another crazy week in news.

DON'T MISS MR CLIPS‌

RNC 2024: Day 4

I would not recommend taking a magical mystery edible before tuning in.

Republican Lunatic STUNNED When Reporter Rips Her Moronic BS to Shreds

Former Fox 10 Phoenix anchorwoman Kari Lake seems utterly baffled when confronted by a real journalist.

PARTING WORDS

"You don't scare me, Giorgia Meloni. After all, you're only 1.2m [3ft 9in] tall. I can't even see you."

-- Italian journalist Giulia Cortese, in online posts mocking the far-right Italian prime minister that were deemed defamatory and "body shaming" by a court, which ordered her to pay roughly $5,400 in damages. Reacting to the verdict, BBC News reports that Cortese likened the "appalling and shameful" Italian government under Meloni to Viktor Orban's authoritarian Hungary, citing its "serious problem with freedom of expression and journalistic dissent."

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